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So This... Is Goodbye

I leave LJ. I already left it, actually. This is my new Wordpress blog, for those of you who did not already know this. There I try to post some of my more memorable LJ posts, as well as what happens in my life now.

LJ has too much spamming, and as a paid customer I simply could not accept this. I'll still lurk around for ONTD and random comments on your blogs, but I've turned off the comments because my inbox gets spammed too much. It's sad, I've loved LJ and been loyal to it for six years now, but no more. But yay, Wordpress! It's cool and new with all its novelty factoriness!

Sad news.

Due to way too much spamming these last months I have decide to slowly but surely blog someplace else.
I shall keep you posted as to where I end up, of course, and I think I'll bring my most memorable entries with me. Also, I'll still keep on reading your blogs. So, fellow bloggers, any suggestions as to where I should move my Pool of Thoughts?

Edit: the saddest part is that all my lovely icons won't be used anymore...


and yet a new way of failing to pick me up.

Yesterday was a nice fun day. As almost every Thursday I was at my regular in Oslo with my friends. Apparently I was wearing an outfit that was extremely fitting, because even more attention than regularly was payed me. This resulted in nice and beerful situations, yet also awkward and painful ones.

Take this awkward and painful one for instance.

I'm in the bar ordering my drink. As I finish paying, average looking young male Omar comes over to me and tells me that he would be most delighted if I would join him and his friends at their table for a beer. Noticing that their table is next to the tables where I currently am sitting with my friends I agree, though taking a mental note that no beer was bought me and thus figured he expected nothing else from me than friendly conversation; I am after all a lovely and interesting person who happens to wear hotpants.

His friends turn out to be average looking young male Mr. Boring with average looking girlfriend Mrs. Boring and who are absolutely uninterested in anything or anyone but eachother, and I therefore quickly understand Omar's urgent need for someone to talk to. As we talk, and by we I mean myself, as he was terrible at talking and instead just asked me questions that purposely required long detailed answers, I get gradually more and more bored with Omar as it becomes clear that he no longer needs a conversational partner as much as he needs a sex partner, and he fails to give me compelling arguments for why that should be me, seeing how he tells me nothing about himself and instead fails miserably at discreetly touching my thigh.

I then try to integrate some of my friends in the conversation monologue. I ask my lovely average looking friend young male Gabriel to join in, but for some mysterious magical reason he manages to reach through to Mr. and Mrs. Boring, and the three of them seclude themselves from the world into a fiery discussion about something I strongly suspect was feminism in Twilight. As my mouth gets dry from all the talking, and this isn't deep conversation, it is mainly platitudes such as how I enjoy my studies, I try yet again with a new friend. This time it is the turn of good looking young male Bertram with whom I had a rather enjoyable conversation earlier, and who had showed me friendly interest all evening. Seeing how he knew few others in the pub, including him felt like the right thing to do. This gives results.

Omar's behaviour changes drastically, and me who still have a tiny behavioural biologist in my stomach find this quite interesting. I am one of the oh, so many girls who tend to fall for the Alpha male of the group. Now, had Omar been an Alpha male he would have responded to the sudden threat of Bertram's arrival my marking his territory. Which he did in a way. But where the Alpha male would talk to the other male, and thus signal to Bertram that he had no chance, that this female (i.e. me) belonged to him and that Bertram should back down, usually by bragging about his own merits while subtly ridiculing Bertram, he signals to me. Me? As if I, the female, has a say. Naggingly, he tugs at my elbow while mumbling so low that I almost can't hear something that turns out to be SURPRISE SURPRISE another question about me. Where the alpha obviously would touch me and look his opponent straight in the eye Omar looks down and nudges me with his foot under the table.

Bertram, upon noticing this reaction, instinctively adopts the role as the alpha male of the two. He starts by looking Omar in the eye and tells him about his military career. Omar looks down at his hands and mumbles that he was in the military too. Out of kindness and somewhat pity (and well, it is also very very true)I say: "Men in military uniforms are sexy." I ask him where in the armed forces, to which he replies, while still looking at his hands that he was in the navy. So I look at his hands too, and what do I see? A sovereign ring. "Is that real," I ask. He nods and upon request tells me it is indeed his family's. At this Bertram looks down and starts fidgeting with his sunglasses.

What an opening I now have given Omar! Not only is he now able to reposess me, but he can still save face by challenging Bertram's alpha male position and maybe even win it. A normal man (or at least any man I would be even remotely interested in) would now brag about this, or at least tell about his family. I look impressed, which I honestly am. A noble man in a uniform is high up on my list. He could easily have won my attention back. But what does he do? He digs out a nauseatingly large amount of snuff from his snuff box on the table and as he rolls it into shape tells me that he doesn't want to talk about it.

Our young Bertram now asks me if I want to share a cigarette with him. I agree to this eventhough I don't smoke, only because I really don't want to sit around Omar any longer, and I strongly wish to show this to him. (Outside, Bertam's role as alpha was brutally taken away from him by unattractive older male Alphonse, but as we are not lions I left my role as biologist and became Aina the unobtainable especially by you, Alphonse, and walked back in while leaving young Bertram to fend for his own.)

Foolishly, Omar believes he now has won me by default and gathers the courage to ask me back to his flat. As I gently, but firmly shoots him down Bertram reappears, and accidentally bumps into him. This makes him accidentally grab my breast. Did he handle this non-existent problem with the stoic calm and ignoring one would expect from a cool and aloof alpha male? Of course not. Our dear Omar's wonderful reaction is to get extremely flustered and apologising and getting an erection. Which he tries to hide by standing up in a bent, awkward way with his jacket obviously covering his groin area. But I'll give him kudos for one thing: As he left the pub, jacket in groin, he bends over me and asked if he could at least get a close dance before he leaves for the night.

Exams aren't cool

I just cannot read to exams. cramming and last minute studying is not my thing. Then again, slow steady, even studying during a semester... not really my thing either. I love acquiring new knowledge though. Just not to be tested in it.

Maybe I'm not cut out to be a student. I have suspected this since 2004. I just wish this degree was over with now, and not in a year. Man! At least I'm done for the summer after tomorrow. then I just have to finish applying for the uni in France. I want to go to France, I just don't want to do all the administrative stuff that comes with it.

Right now I want to make art. I have already done quite a lot of creative baking and composed two Songs of Frustration. And right now I have one gouache on canvas painting and one wire and papier maché sculpture taking up all the space in my head I need for cramming. You have no idea how hard it is to focus on different French political Parties in the 1800s and what they stand for when I have three different ways of making the ultimate papier mache paste dancing in and out of focus to Song of Frustration no 3.

I tried blocking out my creativity to Deadmau5' new album 4x4=12, but I think it sorta triggers it instead. I've been sketching everywhere; round baby noses, plump cheeks, notes, feathers, feet. I have made my own iced tea and have a new cookie recipe waiting to come out. I have written poetry. Granted, it's terrible poetry, really awful terrible poetry, but I still wrote it along with a scene I think about using in a novel or short story in the future. Adding all this to sorting out my papers and cleaning the kitchen, I'd say these last three days have been filled with bipolarly many things. I wonder what will happen to me on thursday. if I'll burn myself out and die with a manic grin on my face or if I'll just collapse in a heap of non-creative misery.

The worst part is that I have an ugly feeling that instead this enourmous creative boost, bloom, boom (lots of b's and oo's) or whatever will diminish drastically after 3 o'clock tomorrow. And I won't be able to create anything.

Quick note to my faithful readers

Just wanted to let you know that my Norwegian food blog is up and running again. I guess it has quite a lot to do with all the exams I've had and are still having. Yes, currently am having. Gosh dang it. Why on earth did I think 50 points was a good plan in January? As if the normal 30 points were not enough. Egad!


Oh, come on! Surely, there must be a mistake somewhere. I mean, this can hardly be fair?

Of Cats and bombing

”I have never understood women and cats. Cats are independent, they don't listen, they don't come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they're home they like to be left alone and sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.” – friend of a friend of mine.

I understand that this was meant to be a joke, but I don’t think it’s funny. It’s like comparing children to torches. I like my torch when it’s alit but I’d rather my kid wasn’t. Just because you’d prefer one thing to be one specific way doesn’t necessary mean that you want every aspect of your life to follow that exact pattern. I like milk in my coffe, not in my laptop, or on my friend (no wait, that can sometimes be funny), in my shoes and everywhere else in the world.

Now that I have that out of my system…
I guess I’m moody today. So much war everywhere. In Afghanistan they shot at the Soldier’s camp. Stupid Soldier. Lucky for him he was out on a mission that day. If he’d been hit I’d’ve killed him.

My father’s family is in crisis. The situation in Côte d’Ivoire is so terrible, and absolutely nothing like how they present it in the media. Two of my cousins are badly wounded and my aunt’s house is burned to the ground. Most of my city dwelling family has now moved to the village to seek refuge among the trees in the jungle. I was in a really small demonstration. I don’t know if it got noticed by anyone, we weren’t that many. I just hope more people can tell the true story about the election in Côte d’Ivoire.

I am absolutely gobsmacked (in a bad way) by the lies about this in the media. They are telling the story the exact opposite of how it is. I really can’t go into details, but just read up on it and think it’s the opposite. Gbagbo is the good guy, the actual elected president, the one FOR the people. Ouattara is the bad guy. The one France wants as president som they still can control Côte d’Ivoire financially. The UN is actually bombing civilians. People (among them children)are being burned alive. I can’t focus today.

And fuck you, bloody Afghans! Just fucking cooperate so we get our boys home, will you? Stop shooting at them, it obviously didn’t do anything good. We didn't even retaliate. All you did was making three of our boys slightly more sexy and cool with hawt new battle scars that will guarantee them to get laid when they come home on leave next week.

Hmm. Maybe that’s what they wanted, the Afghans. They wanted to help the poor frustrated troops to get laid. Well, in that case… carry on. But stay clear of the Soldier.

more meme

As my friend and fellow blogger Julie says answering memes is like creating a little piece of me frozen in time. And by retaking it I can compare the results and see how much I've changed, and how much as stayed the same.
here's the link to last time I took this meme, if you're interested in comparing.
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a meme!

I realise now, as I am writing this, that I am probably never going to finish my cool "digitalize my past"-project, and anyway definately not today. I'd much rather do this meme that at least two of my friends have done already. It was interesting to see how similar yet totally different they were. Let's see how my answers are, shall we?

1. Make a list of 5 things that are in your bag:
-my wallet
-my phone
-my day planner
and if I have a larger bag and not a purse
-a book
I keep my keys usually in my coat pocket

2. What is the significance of your journal name?
It's the place where I keep some of my thoughts. Like a pool, if you like. Hence "the Pool of Thoughts".

3. What is one item of clothing you wish you could always wear?
Always the same item. Eeew? I have hygiene.

4. What do you plan to do after this meme?
I plan to go to sleep, but I'll probably end up watching TVseries in bed.

5. What are you listening to right now?
The nice soothing sound of Oslo by night. (I've been away to the Western part of the country for a week, and I just realised how much I miss city noises.)

6. Who was the last person you hugged?
Oh wow, I don't know. Maybe my dance partner yesterday. Or the headmaster (who tried to cup a feel btw 0_o).

7. What was the last thing you downloaded?
On the Road with Austin and Santino.

8. What did you do today?
Travelled. For what seemed like forever.

9. What was the last game you played?
I actually won a Stev contest yesterday. (stev is an old Norwegian short melodic rhyme)

10. What websites do you always visit when you go online?
iGoogle (as it is my homepage) and thus my email. Facebook. TvT. ONTD and yr.no

11. What irritates you nearly on a daily basis?
People. Slow walkers. the subway hours where I live.

12. If you could afford to go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
twelve hours ago it would have been home. Exactly twelve hours ago I said to my friend: If I could go anywhere in the world right now I'd teletransport home. But seeing how I am home now... Dubai maybe.

13. What did you want to be when you were a kid?
Here goes in chronological order:
A firefighter
A pediatrician
A puppetmaker
A bank director
A teacher
A ballerina
A waitress
A writer
A publisher
A child's psychologist
A regular psychologist
The wife of Prince William (see Queen)
... or someone else from old money, which is also my current dream job.
A ninja

14. Ever had a weird dream? What was it about?
ever had a weird dream, they ask. To quote an earlier entry: "Last night I dreamt that Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes was into erotic asphyxiation." In the latest dream I had I dreamt I was a king with a lot of beard and I beheaded people for almost anything. It made me very uncomfortable, as I didn't like the blood. If you want to read more of my dreams follow this link.

15. What are you doing this weekend?
Sleeping. Homework and packing.

16. If you could play any musical instrument, which one would you play?
I wish I could be better on the piano. Like superdupertalented. I wish I could wow people with my mad pianoskills. And maybe a harp. I wish I had a better singing voice. And that I could play the flute. All instruments in the world would be nice, although it doesn't matter if I never truly master the art of didgeridoo. I saw one didgeridoo player once, he had plenty of drool everywhere.

17. What's the one thing you need the most now?
Sleep. I'm guessing no telly after this.

18. If you could have one superpower, what kind of power would you choose?
I wouldn't need any superpowers if I could have a TARDIS. But I could settle for the ability to read minds. At will, though.

19. What was the last thing you ate?
Cup a soup. Peasoup edition.

20. A feature that you like about yourself.
My empathy.